1. Couples who feel the need to be smooching with each other at the gym. I respect that you want a heathy life together, and you stay in shape so that neither one of you has to know how shallow each other really is, but that does not mean you need to make out on the bench press. I'm sure it is difficult for you to be apart for seconds at a time, but let's not reenact the end of the Titanic while others are strengthening their quads.
2. People who have self control when it comes to food. What are you, wizards? And why do waitresses think it's me who ordered the salad? No, I am the one who ordered the burger and fries and dessert. I am sorry that I need sustenance every 3 hours, and it generally isn't of the healthy variety. But for crying out loud people, stop using your super powers for evil.
3. Not having a clean spoon after I already poured milk on my cereal. This just upsets me so. . .
4. Thinking I am really smart for packing light one my trip to Boston, therefore forgoing the roller bag. This meant having to lug two bags around Orangoutang style through four airports. The problem was only compounded after I bought 6 glass candles at the Yankee Candle magical village in Boston. (Don't judge me until you've seen it's majesty and received 50% off.) My hands now have the aesthetic quality of a weight lifter. My boss, "Morgan, your arms are going to be sore tomorrow from lifting those bags. Now you won't need to feel bad about not working out." Me, "Um . . . I missed the part where I was supposed to feel bad?"
5. Dumb questions. Like the other day when I asked no one in particular in my row of cubicles what the State abbreviation for Seattle was. "Is it SA? Oh . . .wait . . ." *
*For those of you who don't understand this - it is funny because Seattle isn't a state, it's a city. . .
I have 5 more Pet Peeves . . . stay tuned until next time.
Ditto on your #1. The couple that walks around the track at the gym holding hands drives me nuts! If you're going for a leisurely stroll, the gym is not the place.
ReplyDelete